Yesterday was a little tricky for me. I tried not to think about it too much, but inevitably around 4:00 yesterday, the emotions started coming back.
-I wish I could make my husband a father.
-I wish hearing of others pregnancies didn't make me hurt.
-I wish I could focus on the positives instead of the negatives.
-I wish we were doing treatments next month.
-I wish someone would give me a baby.
-I wish my friends and family could understand.
-I wish someone could just "fix-it."
-I wish I had my baby back.
-I wish I wasn't wishing.
-I wish I could just let go and have fun.
-I wish letting go was easier.
-I wish my best friend wouldn't read this post and think I need therapy.
-I wish I didn't feel like 28 was old.
Oh, what am I kidding? I could go on forever.... All things considered, I feel like I've done a pretty good job of dealing with everything, thanks to God. I'm just having a few down days right? Please tell me this too, shall pass.
I've been trying to lose some weight since the miscarriage, and I did well for the first 2 weeks. This weekend I completely blew it, and the scales told me all about it this morning. On that note...one final wish. I wish that food wasn't my comfort.